How can I breathe easy with a gag in my mouth? I'm sick of staring at my feet as I walk. Having to watch my step is such a dreary and lonesome way to live. I've not opened my mouth in a way to be deemed disrespectful. Nor have I raised my hand to you. Not even a finger. Oh but here you are spilling out words that sting like pure venom. They cut to the bone; carrying daggers along the way. I thought tonight would be different. A night and day away we spent from each other and you felt closer than you do tonight.
I'm not perfect. I'm bound to make mistakes. I'm going to be oblivious and forgetful and sometimes even bitter. It's called being human. But when I have to watch how I breathe, I feel a need to leave. To run and never look back. How can I be the bigger person when you make me feel so small? I would jump to the farthest end of this world for you but I will not be bound by ropes while doing so. This constant game of falling short has grown dull and disappointing.
I know you have a bad habit to break and I will do my best to stick by you...but I won't allow myself to feel like a child who didnt eat my vegetables. If you're angry, so be it. But it's unnecessary and immature to implode and then explode. You need to learn to breathe and calmly bring it to my attention. Whatever the problem may be. Because I'm not 12. I'm 21. I should not feel any younger or unintelligent than what and who I am now. I love you and I will stick to my word as much as I can. That you can trust. But you should also know I'm not the girl you knew before. And I won't lock myself in a room with a constant problem. I don't deserve it. We'll see...
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