The Truth Always Hurts

So, I heard. To be honest, I already knew. I felt it in my gut a couple weeks or so ago. But today, it was confirmed.

How do you do it? How do you move on so easily? You found someone else. Even if it's official or not, you've invested your time and emotion into another soul.

Did I mean nothing? I know our relationship was complete and utter bullshit but me as a person, did I hold any tie to your heart?

Maybe I didn't. I don't feel as though I did. Or else you'd be in the same spot I am now. But that's how you are, I guess. A constant shield to block out the bad but able to welcome in the good. Which I guess works for you. It never worked for me. I didn't learn when I held up my walls.

But they're coming back. A lot of things are coming back into my life that I once pushed away. I welcome it all with open arms now. Because now, I have no idea who I am. I hold no motivation to go on and live another day. Though I have too many people who care about me to just toss it away, too.

It's like I'm stuck.

And though I shouldn't, though I don't like to, and though I feel like such a bitch for saying it, but I blame you.

I blame you for every single suicidal tendency that interrupts my day. I believe you're the cause for me becoming a pile of debris on the once beautiful grass.

You're worthless to me now. Just like I am to you, I guess. Considering your lips have come into contact with another and I'm sure at some point, the rest of you as well.

I've never wished ill will upon anyone. Not until now. And maybe I'll get over that. Or maybe you're just one of those very, very few people who deserve such wishes.

Either way.

Thanks for nothing. You're a regret. The first one I've ever had.

Don't break her heart like you break everyone elses. And if this pissed you off, that's fine by me. And if you didn't read this at all, I'm still happy I'm writing it.

Go fuck yourself and don't try to be in my life. Ever. If I want you there, I'll let you know. But heartless people don't deserve to be around the best of the best. Technically, heartless people shouldn't be alive. But that would just be mean.

Oh, and if you want your shit, I'll give it to you myself. I'm not having anyone else play middle man. Grow a pair and face me yourself. If you don't want to do that, then don't expect to get it back until you do.

Thanks.