Fruition, it's a lovely thing. I promise you this.

So today went pretty well. I woke up, showered, and went to the mall with my friend Liz to get some Christmas shopping done. I also got my lip pierced. Again. Haha. Then I went to my aunts house for my baby cousins birthday. She was adorable but I spent most of the night with my other cousin Lauren. And I realized just how grown up she's becoming. I also realized just how scared it makes me! I know she's getting older and has a lot to experience but I don't see her as a cousin. I mean, I do, but I see her as much more than that. I see her as my little sister. We grew up together. I babysat her, I fed her, changed her, played with her. And now she's becoming a woman. A teenage woman. And that's scary!

I guess I just keep thinking about all the "what if's" and it's freaking me out. She's not a bad girl and I don't think she'd purposely put herself in a bad situation. I'm just afraid of all the other people. The peer pressure, the hormones, the lack of compassion, everything. I don't know exactly what I'm saying. I'm just writing it all down. I guess I just never realized how important my family really is to me. And though we don't seem close, I do love them all and thank God for them every day. Because as dysfunctional as we are, and no one knows that side of us well, we're stick around. We're blood. If anything were to happen to anyone, every single Markey would come out of the tiniest hole and be there. Regardless of what people think, I have the most amazing family. And I really wished I had realized just how blessed I truly am a long time ago. Either way, I can't wait to pass on my genes and continue on the Markey love. ...Though that's not happening anytime soon. I'm just saying. Hahaha.